


Love Island...?

by FeliciaAmelloides



Series: A Oneshot a Day... [166]
Category: Lord of the Flies - William Golding
Genre: Alternate Universe- Crack, Awkward Romance, Crack, Dusk - Freeform, First Kiss, Flower Crowns, Fluff, M/M, Wedding, one-sided
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-11
Updated: 2018-06-11
Packaged: 2019-05-21 04:13:26
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,574
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14908115
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/FeliciaAmelloides/pseuds/FeliciaAmelloides
Summary: Instead of splitting into tribes and killing each other, the boys are marrying Ralph off to someone so they can have a big feast and a party to ease the tension between everyone.One problem- who will Ralph marry?





	Love Island...?

**Author's Note:**

> I love Ralmon, and it’s my birthday tomorrow so I’m gonna write about something I love today, so yay Ralmon/Jalph thing!

Yet another morning meeting taken over completely by angry boys. But this time, they weren’t arguing about the fire or the meat. Instead, they had chosen a very different topic to ‘discuss’...

“JACK AND RALPH BELONG TOGETHER!” Maurice screeched from one side of the platform. Roger nodded solemnly, and Bill clapped and cheered loudly.

“No, they do not! If you put together all the information and analyse it thoroughly, you will see that without a shadow of a doubt Simon should be Ralph’s bride.” Piggy tipped his glasses so they flashed like an anime character’s.

The islanders had decided that in order to ease the tension between everyone, they would have a wedding. It was the stupidest idea ever, but the idea of a ceremonial fire and a big feast appealed to everyone, so they all ended up agreeing to it. The only problem was that no one could decide who was going to actually _get_ married.

Ralph was the obvious candidate for the groom of course. He was chief, and he was good-looking enough to pull it off. With one of the choristers cloaks wrapped around his shoulders and a tropical flower tucked into its silver cross, he really looked the part as well. The argument was, of course, who was to be his bride.

Some people thought Jack should get with Ralph. They had a lot of chemistry, and the sexual tension between them was insane. Several of the biguns were only supporting them to spy on them during their wedding night.

But others believed Ralph shouldn’t be with such an asshole, especially since they were constantly fighting. These boys squabbled for a while over who else could take Jack’s place, immediately ruling out Piggy despite his protests, until eventually they settled on Simon, who shyly blushed and said he wouldn’t mind.

So the argument broke out. Simon, Jack and Ralph stood in the centre of the platform watching everyone argue around them and not really knowing what to do. Then all of a sudden someone, possibly Walter, yelled,

“Get Ralph to decide!” Everyone else cheered suddenly, appreciating Walter’s genius. The boy flushed pinkly with pride, having never received such pleasant attention before. Ralph, on the other hand, was mortified. He had to choose? What?

“How do you expect me to choose? Jack’s an arsehole and Simon’s batty. I don’t want either of them.” Simon made a strange noise, but otherwise didn’t react. Jack, however, wasn’t so composed.

“What the bloody hell do you mean, I’m an arsehole? You’re the only arsehole here!” Maurice whispered something about sexual tension to Bill, causing him to laugh.

“Shut the hell up Jack.” Ralph snapped, turning to look sideways at Simon, who was deliberately avoiding his gaze.

“You should kiss.” A voice said out of nowhere. Everyone turned in shock to see that it was Roger who had spoken.

“ _What_?!” Ralph didn’t seem to have realised that getting married to someone involved kissing them. The arguing boys murmured various words of assent, nodding along with it.

“Go for it Ralph. Kiss ‘em both and you’ll see that Simon’s the better candidate.” Piggy encouraged. Simon blushed, but Ralph fortunately (or unfortunately depending on how you look at it) didn’t notice.

“No way! Kiss Jack! Release some o’dat sexual tension!” Bill exclaimed from the other end. Ralph just glared at both of them before finally turning to the boys before him.

“I choose Simon,” He stated flatly, “There’s no way in hell I’m ever kissing that ginger bastard, C# or not.” Uproar amongst the crowd. The meeting was in shambles. But Ralph had made his choice, and Simon was carted off by the biguns and a few of the more mature littluns to get ready for the ceremony.

*

It was evening by the time everything had been smoothened out. Jack was best man, but secretly he wished he had been the one to step forwards and marry Ralph. Not that he’d ever admit it.

The evening sun made the sky glow in shades of gold, copper and amber, setting the mood for a ceremony made under the stars. Dusk settled upon the island, and the heat became more bearable by the second. Ralph stood at the ‘altar’ (aka the platform), waiting with baited breath for Simon to arrive. In his hands was a flower crown, which he was to place upon Simon’s dark locks to symbolise their unity. Then they got to have a feast and party... maybe.

Just as Ralph was about to ask Piggy, who was acting as the vicar, where the bloody hell his bride-to-be was, a rustling in the bushes marked Simon’s arrival.

And God, he was _beautiful_. The biguns had managed to fasten large palm leaves around Simon’s waist to form a sort of gown, and were using other leaves combined with flowers to make up the top part of the dress. A cloak was on his head to act as a veil, meaning that he couldn’t see but no one really cared. Simon was walked up the aisle by Maurice, who betrayed Bill over the whole Jalph thing by switching sides and supporting Ralmon. Ralph found himself blushing slightly when he realised he and Simon were going to have to kiss in a couple minutes.

When Simon reached the edge of the platform, Ralph carefully removed his cloak so that he could see once again. The golden light descending from above them lit up the boy’s hair and eyes so that he seemed to be glowing. He offered Ralph a shy smile that set his heart alight, but didn’t do anything else. Ralph was beginning to think marrying Simon wouldn’t be too bad.

“Gentlemen and gentlemen, we are gathered here today to celebrate the not that holy union of these two gentlemen today.” Piggy began in a somewhat bored tone. Someone laughed at his excessive use of the word ‘gentlemen’.

“You two are getting married because we want an excuse to have a feast. I personally support you, but I know several people don’t and I think they should just get over themselves. Now, the vows,” Piggy smiled at both boys in turn, ignoring the way Ralph rolled his eyes when he complained about people not agreeing with him. But anyway. It was time for the vows. Simon took a deep breath and began, nervousness carrying the smile away from his face.

“Ralph. I know we haven’t spoken very much, and I know I can be annoying when I pass out while we’re building the shelters, but I wanted you to know that despite these things I’ve really enjoyed all the time I’ve spent with you so far. I promise to protect you from the possibly non-existent Beast, cherish your presence on this island and help you to help us get rescued as much as I can.” The dark-haired boy spoke in a confusing rush, but no one complained. His speech was nice. Ralph frowned, however. How was he going to top that? Maybe... honesty? Yeah. Honesty. The gorgeous, vivid green of Simon’s eyes simultaneously compelled and inspired him.

“Simon... I don’t really know how to start this. You’re not that annoying when you faint? You’re better than Jack anyway. Um, I wanted to say that I don’t really think you’re all that batty. And you’ve definitely been more helpful than anyone else here. I... I really think we wouldn’t have survived nearly as long if you hadn’t been here. It’s an honour to be marrying you tonight.” It wasn’t anything spectacular, but the look on Simon’s face made it clear that he thought so. Piggy smirked at Bill and Roger smugly. Bill just glared at him, then at Maurice (the traitor).

“Thank you, both of you. Now, please adorn the flower crowns.” Both boys nodded at Piggy before reaching up at the same time to place their flower crowns on each other’s heads. This resulted in their hands knocking together, leading to a few sniggers from the audience and a lot of awkwardness between the newly-weds. Eventually, they were able to get the crowns on. Ralph’s was blue and white and yellow, and he liked it more than he’d admit to anyone there. Simon’s was green, purple and pink, and it somehow suited him. White flowers also adorned his crown, something Piggy said was a sign of suffrage. Simon was playing the role of a woman after all. He deserved the vote. No one else really cared about all that; they just liked the pretty colours.

“Okay, you guys can kiss. Congratulations on your marriage.” Simon and Ralph just looked at each other. They could... kiss? Neither of them wanted to admit that they didn’t know how, but everyone else’s eyes on them made them realise they were going to have to try. Slowly Ralph leaned towards Simon, gently placing a hand on his cheek. The shorter boy stiffened, but didn’t pull away. The distance between them shortened considerably as they began to gravitate towards each other. Soon enough, their lips were only inches apart and neither knew what to do next.

Then Simon took the plunge and leaned forwards just that little bit further to seal their lips.

The kiss was soft, chaste, clumsy, and only lasted a second, but it was still the best one either boy had had. Probably because it was the only one either boy had had.

Two seconds later, Simon fainted.

Best. Wedding. Ever

...?

**Author's Note:**

> One of my first ever ideas for Ralmon was this wedding scene on the island, except slightly different because my shameless self-insert character would have been with Jack ((don’t worry, she only exists for my own guilty pleasure- I’ve never tortured anyone by sharing her about on the Internet... yet ;-) )), which is where the inspiration for this oneshot came from.
> 
> Where are Samneric, you ask? ~~I forgot about them~~.
> 
> I just couldn’t be bothered to include anyone else.
> 
> Prompt- First Kiss.
> 
> This could have been Gerita (?), or Panlie, or Penygma, but nahhhhh-  
> It’s Ralmon~
> 
> Original Number- 239.


End file.
